I've Got A Knife Oven Mitt

Maybe it's a warning. Maybe it's a statement of fact. Whatever it is, it's pink and cute and a damn near perfect match for your kitchen.

The ambiguity is the entire joke, and the pink is what makes it land. Delivered in black on a plain mitt the line would read as genuinely alarming; in cheerful pink it becomes funny, which is a lesson in how much color does for tone.

It is a properly capable mitt underneath. Super-insulated and made from 100% cotton, so it handles heavy dishes and hot racks without any drama — which is reassuring given the sentiment.

Hang it on the oven door and let visitors work out for themselves which reading applies.

A great gift for a housewarming or a hostess! Also an excellent white elephant contribution, and a good present for a confident cook who enjoys keeping people slightly on edge. Pink, cute and mildly threatening.

At a glance

• 100% cotton
• Super-insulated
• Funny printed design
• Suits everyday cooking and baking
• Hangs on an oven door